Anyone Need a Hug?
Fun August 26th, 2008
Yep. You landed on a humor blog, but I’m allowing myself to get serious for a minute.
I’m convinced the reason people lose there ever lovin’ minds at the end of the day is because they haven’t encountered one act of kindness since they woke up in the morning.
I know this because when I let a guy in front of me at a store checkout counter tonight, you would have thought I’d just handed him the million dollar suitcase from Deal or No Deal. And the buxom woman who goes with it.
The poor guy was shifting back and forth and sighing for what must have felt like an eternity for him. He thanked me three separate times for letting him slip through at another counter after he had to wait behind a woman making a complicated return. I thought he was going to hug me next and invite me to dinner.
We tend to think that people who lose it are mentally-unbalanced. I don’t think that’s the primary reason. It’s because everyone is in a hurry, nobody thinks of other people and when you just have to run to the store for a bottle of medicine for your sick kid after a brutal day at work, you’re on your last nerve and no one gives you a tiny little break.
It doesn’t take a huge donation to charity to change the world. All it takes are simple acts of kindness. It costs you nothing and pays big.
Has anyone shown you a small kindness lately? Share your stories and uplift me. Oh, and virtual hugs all around!
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August 26th, 2008 at 6:42 pm
{{hugs}}
a friend of mine whom I’ve neglected to keep in communication with hasn’t held it against me or rubbed it and even called me tho I owed her the call!
chatblanc’s last blog post..A killer rack!
August 26th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
1) Oh crap. A serious entry. Forgive my smart-ass reply on Twitter.
2) I’m with you on the random acts of kindness thing.
3) I’m also starting a “Random act of bitch-slapping” for idiots I encounter.
4) Can’t wait to see the outpouring of humanity in the comments to follow.
5) Jaffer has never received a hug after holding up a grocery checkout line.
Geakz’s last blog post..Top Ten Reason’s “Top 10 Lists” Suck.
August 26th, 2008 at 6:55 pm
Twenty minutes after a literal knock-down fight with his sister, my son finished his dinner, leaned over to me and gave me a small kiss.
Made my day.
feefifoto’s last blog post..Should I Be Crying?
August 26th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
So many people have been kind to me lately, I wouldn’t know where to begin. I am so blessed. Notably though, I appreciate a darling waitress who served our family on Sunday when we went out for lunch after church. Her name was Tanya and she could not have been more courteous or attentive. She left the second mile in her dust and went the third mile. It made our lunch out together all the more enjoyable. She was handsomely rewarded monetarily by us, but I think her real reward is in the fact that she is just a genuine sweetheart … regardless of whether it results in a 20-percent tip.
That was really nice what you did for that guy, Kathy.
Jenny’s last blog post..Check Your Gig Line … Again
August 26th, 2008 at 7:27 pm
Well the guy in traffic who cut me off yesterday didn’t throw anything at me after he flipped me the bird. Does that count?
Seriously, I agree with you. The idea of treating other people civilly seems to have been lost in the past couple of decades. Simple acts of kindness definitely don’t happen often enough.
August 26th, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Do you have an extra sidebar now? Or is it me. I dunno.
Ummm…I hate hugs. They make me ugly. LOL
But, I know what you mean about just being nice. Never underestimate how important those little niceties are. They can really make a difference in someone’s day.
DrowseyMonkey’s last blog post..1 Year of Photos
August 26th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
Now, I like all the hugs I can get….well except those little polite hugs that don’t mean a thing :O)
Sadly those little acts of kindness are few and far between now. I would go as far as to say people, generally, are down right rude.
I certainly have had kindness shown to me quite a lot lately, but it’s been cyber kindness. Does that count?
Babs - beetle’s last blog post..I felt the music in me.
August 26th, 2008 at 7:56 pm
chatblanc — Hugs right back! We must have the same friend. Mine doesn’t ever make me feel bad for letting too much time pass between calls. If I could just get her to take up emailing!
Geakz — Threw ya, didn’t I? Idiots. That’s a whole different kind of thing. Those I pray for. They need it. Poor hugless Jaffer. Can you just see him walking around stores asking for and giving hugs?
feefifoto — Oh, that’s so wonderful! See, kisses make it all better. Thanks for sharing.
Jenny — I’m glad to hear you are so blessed. There is a special place in heaven for sweet, attentive waitresses. I can’t fathom the amount of garbage they put up with. It amazes me they can keep handing out smiles. Glad you got the table you did and thank you for telling us about it.
Lee — I’m serious. I pray for the idiots, especially the nasty drivers. They need prayers more than I do. I know you’ve written on this topic before and I’m glad. I think we all need reminding now and then that we’re all human and could use a little kindness throughout the day.
DrowseyMonkey — Yes, I got me another sidebar. I didn’t like the single really long one. Make you ugly? How is that possible? If you don’t like hugs, how ’bout just a smile and a nod? That’s another thing I make an effort to do: smile at strangers. They can’t NOT smile back! It’s great!
Babs beetle — Me, too. Hey, if you’re gonna hug me, make it count! I think we’re all just tired and cranky. Why can’t we have those nice long European vacations over here? Oh, yes. Cyber kindness is equally good. Kindness, wherever it’s found, is still kindness.
August 26th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
Sometimes it’s the little gestures of thoughtfulness that mean the most.
Daisy the Curly Cat’s last blog post..Tips on Tuesday: About Manners
August 26th, 2008 at 8:16 pm
I work in the only group in the Red Cross that has a Customer Service department: the technology group. I take my role very seriously (except when I am mercilessly mocking my customers behind their backs.) But most of the time, I try really hard to make it easier for other volunteers to use computers to make their jobs easier. After all, they are the ones doing the really hard work of helping disaster victims recover after losing their homes or family members. I can’t handle that stuff; it makes me cry.
So I try to be upbeat and cheerful and blame the silly machines for the problems, not the end users. Even when they do stupid, stupid things that make the computer shudder in horror. And for that, every once in a while, I get a hug.
And it makes it all worthwhile.
Louise’s last blog post..A “rain event”
August 26th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
i will always let someone in front of me if they only have a few things. it makes me feel like less of a jerk for cussing them out in the parking lot for driving like a blind grandmother.
if you’re interest, i’m hosting a giveaway on my blog.
Kelly’s last blog post..My First Giveaway
August 26th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
@Geakz @Kathy - You cyber-bullies you !
Ha ! Ha ! Now I shall never look at a Food Basics like any ‘normal’ grocery store !
There’s Jaffer standing in the aisles, alone, empty handed. And around him are green grocery-carts rolling but no-one pushing them…
Jaffer’s last blog post..My thoughts on bottled-water-containers
August 26th, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Thank you for sharing such a wonderful post, Kath!
I find that it’s the “simple things” like what you did for this gentleman, that sometimes mean the most.
And yes, SO MANY times…people have supported and been THERE for me…when I needed help.
I feel VERY blessed!
{{{teddy bear hug}}}
Ron’s last blog post..Changing the Shower Curtain Liner
August 26th, 2008 at 9:36 pm
I know what you mean about people losing their minds because no one seems to give you a break. I’m still adjusting to this BUT, Collegetown, MN is a LOT nicer than Hometown, WI. Why?? I don’t know and I Don’t care. The way I see it is that this means the world will maybe *crosses fingers* be a bit nicer in the future. FOR EXAMPLE: Today I was going to put my bassoon away in my locker and had my hands full. I was approaching a pull door and someone, walking towards me, turned around walked the ten feet back to the door and OPENED IT FOR ME!! That same senerio has happened at highschool in Hometown and NO one stopped to help. Ahh I feel better about the way the world maybe one day.
Thanks Kathy! *** HUGS ***
sarah’s last blog post..Messy Move In and a Fine First Night
August 26th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
A camel walks into a grocery store…
Wait !
What’s a camel doing in Canada ?
If you ever get to travel across India, do so by train. You’ll definitely come across a scene, where a crowded train is slowly pulling out of the station and someone is running with the train trying to get on.
It won’t be the bars or the rails but it will always be a stranger’s hand sticking from the crowd that will help him get on…
Jaffer’s last blog post..My thoughts on bottled-water-containers
August 26th, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Today I read an article on the internets by a woman who stated that “if you call your husband your best friend that means you don’t have any friends.” She also said that, “if you don’t fight, then you are delusional”. When I shared these written thoughts with my husband he said, “I feel sorry for her that she doesn’t have what we have.”
It makes me want to be kind to everyone that I meet…
That is the everyday occurance with my husband, he is kind, loving and my non fighting best friend and for that I get that kindness every day.
Carla’s last blog post..Truewww wuvvv
August 26th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
This is a post that is long overdue, and I’m glad that you wrote it, Kathy.
I had the honor of working for a year supporting the families of deployed soldiers, and it is amazing the sacrifices, the terror and worry for their soldiers that they endure for 12-15 months, while still reaching out to help others in every way possible. They honor their sons, daughters, wives, husbands, fathers, mothers and brothers and sisters in the military by what they do here, knowing that nothing could equal the supreme sacrifice of giving your life for your country. It is our service men and women that give the ultimate to all of us, and for that, I am thankful.
Always, this is at the back of my mind, and gives everything in my little life a much different and broader perspective. I have no problem giving, smiling, praising, reaching out a hand to help everyone I encounter, now that I’ve met such wonderful, courageous and strong people.
Theresa’s last blog post..It’s Not About Race Already
August 26th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
A wonderful post. What you say is so true - life can be very difficult, and if we can make it a little better for someone even in some small way, that counts.
Elaine - Luxor’s Mom’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday
August 26th, 2008 at 11:45 pm
No acts of kindness around here… But I do try to do my best to spread them when I can. It is amazing how people react when you do something so simple like letting them go before you, or even offering to cover the cost of their item in the store.
Just last week a lady didn’t have enough to pay for her postage so I offered to pay. She insisted she would go home and get it.. I was like “it’s 30 cents, don’t worry about it.” She ended up coming back to pay for it as if someone doing her a favor would cause a fungus to grow across her body.
Nonetheless, I will continue spreading my version of happiness through Texas as much as I can… or until a cowboy mows me down on his tractor.
Monique’s last blog post..Monique Grows Up
August 27th, 2008 at 12:17 am
That’s funny, but that just happened to me this past weekend. I was in some weird/nice/wonderful mood and let the guy behind me (with just one item) go ahead of my several hundred dollars worth of groceries. And he was quite thankful…and it did feel good. Wow, aren’t we special, huh? Seriously, random acts of kindness are underrated and never go out of style.
peace,
mike
livelife365
I Miss My Hair
Mike Foster’s last blog post..Why Oatmeal Rules!
August 27th, 2008 at 12:45 am
While in college, I studied Business and Psychology.
In one of my Psych classes, we saw a study of babies in a nursery who were dying of unknown causes. These babies did not have parents and were wards of the state.
They discovered that these babies were all going a very long time without being touched or held. The study concluded these babies NEEDED human touch, that it was critical for their survival.
So extra nurses were hired, with their sole job description being to go around throughout the nursery and hold these babies. The end result? The death rate sharply dropped.
Yet often, as we grow into adulthood, we no longer receive any sort of act of kindness. We’re in too big of a hurry.
You just never know how kindness and and respect, even when inconvenient, affects someone.
August 27th, 2008 at 4:25 am
I’ll never forget the guy that helped me change a flat on my car. I didn’t ask for help but he must of known I was stressing. It took half the time it would of taken me to change it and I was back at home within no time.
Curtis’s last blog post..Google Info at your texting finger tips
August 27th, 2008 at 4:47 am
Yup, pay it forward DOES work!
WillThink4Wine’s last blog post..Wednesday Stuff
August 27th, 2008 at 5:14 am
I am notorious for stopping to help people I don’t know. It’s something my parents always did, and I inherited it. I can’t help but hope it sets a good example for others, nut the world would be a better place if we just stop to lend a hand to those in need. Sometimes it seems like we are in too big a hurry, but most of the time it is less than 30 seconds to do the right thing.
Chris Casey’s last blog post..Cleaning out the Garage
August 27th, 2008 at 5:22 am
I let a gentleman in front of me in the grocery yesterday as well.
Saturday my aunt and I went through the drive-thru for Starbucks coffee - the guy in front of us was the youth minister from her church, when we got to the window he had paid for our coffee. Nice surprise. My aunt in turn paid for the cars behind us. Hopefully that made their day and they paid it forward in some way!
Great post. A little kindness goes a long way!
Toni’s last blog post..I admit it…
August 27th, 2008 at 5:27 am
Daisy the Curly Cat — Yep, and what may seem insignificant to one person might be HUGE to another.
Louise — You play an important support role and even though it can seem small in the scheme of the work the Red Cross does, what you do helps their mission. That’s how I look at my own tech support job in education. I don’t teach, but I help the ones who do.
Kelly — Waiting in line is such a big stress for people, which is why it’s a gift to let them ahead. Kudos! I checked out your photos. I love tulips, so you know which one I’ll be voting for!
Jaffer — Hey, Geakz started it! Doesn’t Food Basics sell hugs, too?
Ron — I think sometimes people thing the little stuff doesn’t matter, but it’s exactly the small stuff that means so much. I’m happy you feel so blessed. Hugs back!
sarah — I’m glad you’re finding Collegetown brimming with friendliness. I once worked with a woman who was from the south and it bothered me that she said we northeasterners weren’t as friendly. Always stayed in the back of my mind. Good luck to you as your semester gets underway. {{hugs}}
Jaffer — Now there’s a literal helping hand! (I might need two to help me on board, though!)
Carla — Good for you! That woman’s observations are very sad. It sounds perhaps that she picked the wrong mate!
Theresa — It’s easy to overlook their sacrifices if it’s not happening in front of our faces, or if you don’t know the family of anyone who’s serving. Back home, we can do our small part by showing each other a little civility and kindness, eh? Thanks for sharing.
Elaine, Luxor’s Mom — It counts, it spreads and it’s cumulative. Proof positive that all it takes is a tiny seed.
Monique — It’s amazing to me the problems we have accepting small acts of kindness sometimes. That’s a sign we’re not doing enough as a society to help each other. We shouldn’t feel any different accepting a kindness than giving it. Shouldn’t it be easier? Thanks for your story.
Mike Foster — They are underrated! Someone once told me you don’t give so you can feel good, that it’s selfish. I don’t necessarily agree because if giving makes you feel better, wouldn’t that make you give more?
PaulsHealthBlog — You hit the nail on the head. I think we travel through life too quickly trying to get somewhere else, and we miss opportunities to improve “the here and now.” Thanks for sharing those facts about human touch. Its importance cannot be stressed enough.
Curtis — Yea! And I bet he doesn’t even realize how grateful you were for the aid. Thirty-five years ago I stepped on a bee and got stung. A complete stranger carried me three blocks on her back to my house. I bet she wouldn’t even remember doing that and would laugh that I recall it all these years later.
WillThink4Wine — Absolutely, and it costs us nothing but time. And even then, it may only be a second or two. Amazing, isn’t it?
Chris Casey — Bingo! If we would all just slow down for a minute, imagine the possibilities. That is one thing I noticed when I traveled to Europe. The pace of life is much slower and the interactions between people were richer for it. I missed that when we came home. Also, I found Canadians to be extraordinarily friendly. I’m convinced our fast-paced life hurts us more than it helps.
Toni — That’s awesome! I love these stories. I hope that chain of kindness kept going on and on and on….
August 27th, 2008 at 6:12 am
I know I’ve done kind things that elicited a positive reaction, but since I can’t think of a single example, it must have been too long since the last time that happened. Thanks for the reminder.
Mark Stoneman’s last blog post..Two Old Letters to the Editor
August 27th, 2008 at 6:16 am
heck,i need a hug and that’s because that’s all i ever do is display acts of kindness. i always yield when i can. i’m starting to feel like i’m going to lose it!
true though we are all in a rush and it’s all about “me” (not me but us)…that’s the way the world is. self-importance.
my acts of kindness come mostly from family and friends. they go over the top. strangers? not so much.
i like funny kathy and i like the serious kathy. great post. something to think about. please come again.
Natural’s last blog post..Doggone, Grandma
August 27th, 2008 at 6:20 am
Hmm, I think I’ll do a random act of kindness today!
August 27th, 2008 at 7:37 am
Do you let perfect, or for that matter imperfect, strangers hug you?
If so, I’ll get in line.
Richard Catto’s last blog post..[LOLCAT PIC] Seven weeks, bitch! Seven FUCKING weeks!
August 27th, 2008 at 7:51 am
This is going to sound sort of snobby but in actuality I don’t mean it to be. I think the lady at the grocery was doing an RAK when she explained the self check register to me and some of it’s tricks so it could be easier to use…but I suspect that was part of her job. Other than that I can’t actually remember experiencing an RAK in quite awhile.
I, however, enjoy doing them myself. And it doesn’t really bother me too much that I don’t get them. I enjoy being that person. It makes me feel good about myself. And with being an at home mom I need all the help I can get feeling better about myself.
Lori’s last blog post..Just some random “Ben” moments
August 27th, 2008 at 7:55 am
I’ve decided that everytime I have the opportunity to let another driver merge in front of me or pretend I don’t see them, I’m going to take that extra 5 seconds to say “go ahead”. I think the karma for me, for them, that 1 second “thank you!” feeling is worth it.
sue’s last blog post..MORE Words I Made Up
August 27th, 2008 at 8:11 am
Like Jenny, above, I really appreciate those people who work with the public that go the extra mile. So many people are rude or just don’t care. It means a lot to me when someone obviously takes pride in their work and cares about the customer.
But they don’t have to hug me!
JD at I Do Things’s last blog post..I Did Things in Canada so you don’t have to
August 27th, 2008 at 8:13 am
Kathy,
Actually, you provided the kindness!
One post with an elegant description of a “boob episode” followed by one with a potential fantasy of a Deal or No Deal buxom woman.
You have made my day!
August 27th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Woo-hoo, I am a firm believer in this. It’s not the big showy acts that count, as much as the teeny little ones that help make peoples’ days one kindness at a time.
Somebody lets me get into line in traffic without running me over, and my whole commute is made! I try to return the favor as often as I can.
Jenn’s last blog post..Back-up Girl Takes On Captain Anonymous
August 27th, 2008 at 9:29 am
Very little kindness ever comes my way. When it does, I am usually just as grateful as your line jumper was.
Bucky’s last blog post..A New Type Of Evil: Nigerian Spawners
August 27th, 2008 at 9:57 am
Great post!
Lauren’s last blog post..Is This The Change America Needs?
August 27th, 2008 at 10:40 am
I know what you mean. I know this one blogger who drove like 8 hours just to meet me! Talk about an act of kindness! She’s awesome.
Jeff’s last blog post..I’m taking off to Canada eh, you hosers
August 27th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Oh Kathy, sweet post.
The whole kindness topic is complex though but at anytime believe in yourself and your actions. If you where to ask me if its ok to be rude or kind? I would say, its all ok when you know its ok.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:58 am
You are absolutely right. You know, as anthropoids, we have evolved to keep contact with our group by touch, with plenty of hugs, casual strokes, pats, and so on. In this day and age it’s clearly not appropriate to go round doing this all day to people, but when a day goes by without a single hug or touch on the arm happening for us, I think it raises our stress levels.
I actually do believe some mental health issues are simply a case of insufficient human contact.
Jay’s last blog post..The Quilt Gremlin
August 27th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
I always let people with one or two items in front of me and my $200+ worth of groceries. They always act like no one has ever done it before. Sad. I also let folks in front on me when driving. You know, we all have to get somewhere, why not cooperate, and make the trip nicer for everyone?
This weekend I was delivering a horse (Chevy suburban plus HUGE horse trailer). I had to travel for a bit on the Washington DC beltway, and when I was trying to merge, a lady saw what I was doing, slowed down, and put on her flashers to let me in. Not only was she courteous, but she also made the beltway a safer place.
shadowsrider’s last blog post..‘Alternate’ ways
August 27th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
I don’t get enough hugs, anymore, and I can really feel the difference. My Staples representative at work recently resolved an issue for me, and afterward she sent me this message: “I just want you to know that I truly appreciate your honesty. It’s always a pleasure to help you out.” This brought tears to my little PMS eyes as it was the nicest thing anyone had said to me all day.
Nancy’s last blog post..Puppy mills
August 27th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
While surfing online now at this cool place http://www.mauritius.com/ i came back to check on the blah and wow factor of your message in this blog post. Nice post, Kathy. Thanks.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Kathy - you cut through all my anger and gruffness and found that elusive stray ovary of mine. This is a fantastic insight into our modern society. Damnit! You made me shed an honest-to-God tear. What are you doing to me? Thank you for this post, and many warm and prolonged hugs from me to you - TNO
The Nemesing One’s last blog post..Stop Screwing Around With The Cheerleaders!
August 27th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
Kathy- If you’re doling out hugs today, give a big ol’ cyber squeeze to Geakz! It’s his birthday!
August 27th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Mark Stoneman — I’m having a hard time thinking what I’ve done lately. Unless you count saving someone from hitting another car tonight. They honked their horn at me because I didn’t let them turn in front of me, but had they advanced through traffic, they’d have plowed into someone the weren’t able to see. Yeah, I’m gonna go ahead and count that one.
Natural — Don’t lose it! Here’s a {{hug}}! I’m glad your family and friends are heaping kindness on you. Yes, it’s great to think about this. All day I felt uplifted having read through these comments.
Regan — Do it! It’s fun to look for ways to help. Stopping for a minute here and there to help someone makes for a better day all around.
Richard Catto — Only the non-creepy ones. Are you creepy? I’m thinking not, so come over here and gimme a hug!
Lori — There’s another thing I’m thankful for. People who actually do their jobs and help me. If I don’t have to flag someone down in a store, I’m overjoyed. I’m with you. Showing kindness has two benefits: both the giver and receiver make out in the deal. Win-win!
sue — I’m with you. I remind myself that it’s better to let the hurried people ahead of me. Sometimes it’s selfish, because I don’t want them crawling up my butt. Better to wave them on. And the karma ain’t bad either!
JD at I Do Things — Customer service isn’t what it used to be, which is why exceptional service is cause for a grand celebration. No hugs, of course.
BabaBooey — What is it with me and boobs lately? I’m glad to oblige. I’ll see what I can do for you next post, K?
Jenn — The thing that’s so great is it costs nothing but time. What makes it special is that people have so little of it these days. I’m sad about that. Why should it take until retirement to slow down?
Bucky — Oh, no! Poor Bucky! Since we put this all out in the universe, I predict some kindness will come your way soon. I know, I sound like a fortune cookie.
Lauren — Glad you liked it. Pass it on!
Jeff — Yes, but do you know how happy you made her???
navin — I’m glad I stopped for a minute to reflect.
Jay — Agreed. It’s not PC to touch people in even an innocent way, at least not in the workplace. I think we should have a day a week to go around hugging people. Would I get arrested? Fired? Hmmm….
shadowsrider — Yes, it’s sad. Shouldn’t be like that. But glad you found a kind person on the insane roads of Wash., D.C. I’ve heard horror stories about driving there!
Nancy — Aw! How wonderful! It’s terrible that a note like that is so rare that it brings tears to your eyes. Proves how necessary a kindness like that is to keep us afloat (PMS or not!)
navin — Nice to see it had such an effect on you. I loved reading through all the comments. I’ve been smiling the last half hour.
The Nemesing One — Then I’ve done my job. I wanted to slow down for a minute and reflect. I’m glad this post affected you so much. I’m affected, too, by all the wonderful comments. I want to run down the street offering hugs! Might get me committed, but I want to do it anyway. {{hugs}}
Mz. Geakz — I’m there! Happy Birthday to your man! Will there be cake?
August 27th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
@Kathy: I used to follow a South African blog a few years ago where a young (married) woman in her early 30s had an experience with some old guy who used to do handy man work on her property.
One day as he was leaving he went to give her a hug, and she let him and she ended up with his tongue halfway down her throat, which apparently disgusted her, but then again, her husband was a regular reader, so who knows?
But, I wouldn’t do that to you, of course… unless you wanted me to. Haha.
Richard Catto’s last blog post..[LOLCAT PIC] Seven weeks, bitch! Seven FUCKING weeks!
August 27th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I have a couple of stories…one on the giving end, one on the receiving end.
In 2002, I lived in Charlotte, NC. We had a really bad ice storm that winter that knocked out the electric to over a million people in the area. My neighbors and I mostly all had fireplaces, but because the storm hit so unexpectedly, you couldn’t find a bundle of wood, or a fake fire log anywhere. We and two of our neighbors resorted to looking behind stores and grocery stores for unwanted pallets. We would break them up and burn them in our fireplaces…all of us helping each other.
When that ran low, I loaded my two kids up in the truck and we began foraging for downed trees on the side of roads. We gathered enough to help us for a few days, and our two neighbors, but when our electric came back on, we had more than we needed.
Living in an apartment community, our electric came back on, but a lot of the neighboring buildings still didn’t have electric. So my son and my husband went door to door offering our excess wood. You’d have thought they were peddling crack cocaine. Most folks wanted to know “How much is it gonna cost me?” My husband and son couldn’t give it away! Most people thought there was some sort of unseemly motive behind the offer.
I think most people are not used to others’ generosity. And I think you’re right…in this day and age of people cutting you off in traffic and then cursing you, people cutting in line, most folks don’t know what simple acts of kindness are and when offered such small things, they certainly don’t know how to react.
now, for my own personal pay it forward story…
http://by-la.com/?p=17
lala’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday
August 27th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
Nope, no one had done didly for me recently…..therefore I am lockng and loading my Colt 45 ….. the bastards had their chance…….
Bruce’s last blog post..The Bigger Perspective
August 27th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
One of my favorites: You know that weird little spot on 95 coming back from MD into DE that has a toll going north but not south? (Maybe this has been changed since I’ve been down there and learned how to avoid the whole stretch by going Rt 1 but I don’t know.) ANYHOODLE, one night this girl was in front of me in what I’d describe as a ‘college car’, kind of a POS, lots of stickers…she was having this long conversation with the toll guy, who had a clipboard out. I figured she didn’t have any money. So I waved a $10 out the window and yelled, ‘I’ve got it!’. He pointed at me, said something to her, and she stuck half her body out the window and yelled ‘THANK YOU!’. That was so much fun that I used to pay the toll of the person behind me once in a while. I’d just say, “I’ve got his too”. Then they’d spend the length of the bridge trying to catch up to me to look and see if I was someone they knew. EZ Pass kinda wrecked that.
Shieldmaiden96’s last blog post..Love Guns and Donut Runs
August 27th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Oh. I didnt really answer your question. As for someone doing something for me: The City of Corning agreed to allow me to plead guilty to failing to obey a traffic signal instead of 54 in a 30 after I wrote them a letter and explained why I was speeding. As far as I’m concerned, nobody has to be nice to me for the rest of the year.
Shieldmaiden96’s last blog post..Love Guns and Donut Runs
August 27th, 2008 at 7:14 pm
just came back for my hug, D*** i’m needy.
it seems as though some people display acts of kindness like it’s clothing, we put it on and off whenever and i’m wondering how come we don’t wear it as our skin…
RAOC should be lived everyday, it’s so rare that when you do something nice for a stranger, they look at you like you just parted the red sea. it’s a freaking miracle.
Everyday, wish everybody would get on board.
Natural’s last blog post..Doggone, Grandma
August 27th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
maybe i meant RAOK = random acts….yeah that’s it.
Natural’s last blog post..Doggone, Grandma
August 27th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
I’m not too sure about your advice. I hugged some random woman in the grocery store, and she kneed me in the naughty bits.
Joe’s last blog post..Caption This; All this fun, and prizes, too.
August 27th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
Kathy:
I am so glad that you remained in control when the world around was splitting at the seams. Well done.
Several years ago my wife and I were on our way to Las Vegas. It was hot as heck as we drove across the desert, and as luck would have it, we had a major blow out in the front driver’s side tire. It was so bad that it blew the front fender apart - of my favorite Cadillac! Needless to say, when I opened the door and stepped out into the hot sun, I was a little tense. Plus, the car was in the soft sand at the side of the road. Whatever. I popped the trunk and prepared myself for what I knew was going to be a difficult job.
About that time a small pickup pulled off the highway and parked right behind me. Now what’s this? I thought. But then a young twenty-something young man emerged from the truck and told me he would be glad to help me with the tire change. I was reluctant, but he insisted. I could see his young wife waiting in the pickup. She waved. So, I handed him the jack and he took care of the whole thing. I tried to pay him, but he absolutely refused. We exchanged good-byes, and they drove away.
How’s that for making your day?
Happy trails.
Swubird’s last blog post..THE DESERT BORDELLO
August 27th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Kathy, truer words were never spoken. It amazes me how little people care about other people in the course of their normal daily lives. I love doing small acts of kindness for people and getting thanks and appreciation for caring. Even when someone doesn’t show thanks for my kind act I know I did it for the right reasons. Unfortunately, i don’t see many acts of kindness in return, but if yo look hard enough they are there. And I appreciate them very much. Terrific post! Thank you for the reminder. Matt @ Matt-Speak
Matt’s last blog post..5 Stories From The “Absurd Files”
August 27th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
I think you’re right, as I get into a foul humor and act more like a bastard when I’ve gone too long without someone cutting me any slack.
I try to let people into traffic as much as I can, as it’s no big deal to wait five seconds for someone to pull into traffic.
Libertine’s last blog post..Bad Week
August 27th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
you’re such an angel
manilenya’s last blog post..Guest Blogger: Mr. Durano Lawayan on Manilenya
August 27th, 2008 at 11:46 pm
It always feels funny when I drop on my own card!
{{{{{{hugs}}}}}
Luxor’s last blog post..From the Archives
August 28th, 2008 at 12:17 am
Little acts of kindness make all the difference in the world! Even if it’s just a smile from one person to another; sometimes that’s all you need. Ya know?
Ricardo Bueno’s last blog post..[Repost] “Inbox Taming for Busy People”
August 28th, 2008 at 5:39 am
Richard Catto — Ugh! Hope he got a kick in the groin. I prefer a hug of the non-tongue variety, thank you.
lala — Oh, I love that story! That’s making everyone feel warm and fuzzy, literally! Way to go! And I loved your story about the neighbor who picked you out to receive her privacy fence. What a great lady.
Bruce — Uh-oh. {ducks}
Shieldmaiden96 — Wow, that’s awesome! I can’t remember the last time someone paid anything ahead for me, but now I want to do it for others. That’ll be me walkin’ around today with her wallet open. And way to go Corning! Whew!
Natural — You’re right, we should wear it as our skin. And no one should feel shocked when a kindness is shown to them. It proves it doesn’t happen enough as part of our daily life.
Joe — Next time, tell her it’s from Kathy at The Junk Drawer. Gotta save those bits of yours.
Swubird — Makes my day? Makes my week! I love stories like that. Guy sounds like an angel on earth. It amazes me how much others are willing to do without expecting anything in return. Happy trails, indeed. Sorry about the Caddy.
Matt — The great thing is it puts us in a mood to do the same for others. Plants a seed that grows and grows. And all it takes is a little thoughtfulness and almost no time at all. Thanks for dropping by.
Libertine — Driving to and from work is the worst part of my day. I see the least amount of courtesy on the road than anywhere else. More and more, I do like you do and let people get where they’re going. Not worth the struggle and might even make someone chill out. That’s gotta help whoever they come in contact in their day.
manilenya — Not always! But I try.
Luxor — Funny, I feel the same way. I’m glad we connected through EC and hugs right back!
Ricardo Bueno — Smiles are the easiest thing to give away. I think I mentioned before I sometimes like to smile broadly at strangers. It shakes them up a bit and they can’t NOT smile back. At first, I felt funny doing it, but it’s a hoot to see their reaction. “What? You’re smiling at me?”
August 28th, 2008 at 7:03 am
Great observation. And I’ve actually been in that guy’s position, where I am so thankful for someone who took a little extra time to care. And I’ve also been in the position where someone was extrememly grateful for my help, even though I thought what I was doing was nothing more than common courtesy. Go figure! Ironically, I also wrote a little poem about the subject for my blog yesterday.
Henson Ray’s last blog post..The Legend of the Magic Bowl
August 28th, 2008 at 8:54 am
My husband was recently hospitalized. It is very tough right now. I am unable to drive because of an eye condition (haven’t driven in 4 years), and when my husband had a seizure following a stroke, they took his license away for 6 months.
We live in “can’t get there from here”, there is no public transit, his job depends on him being able to get around, so you can imagine our predicament. We were already hit badly before the holidays when he had the stroke and thought we would lose our home now for sure. We cannot get a lot of forms of assistance because we don’t have children, nor are we the type to ask for those kind of handouts. My family (siblings, parents, cousins, etc.) lives over 1200 miles away so we and our dogs are basically housebound for the next 6 months.
Anyway, we could not believe that we called just one person, and had 10 people call back asking to drive us home from the hospital, to drive us to the store, to do whatever.
I am not the type to easily accept help, but so far we have not missed church on the weekend, the grocery store when we needed it, and we even had another Realtor (my husband is one) offered to drive him so he could meet up with a potential customer and want absolutely nothing (no “cut”) in return.
Maybe its because we always help out other people, but I don’t think its tit for tat. I think that when people care about you, you normally push them away,because “you can do it yourself”, but you cannot prevent them from being kind any longer when you are knocked down. I am especially guilty of the “I can do it myself, dangit!” even though some things I did were really stupid and i SHOULD have accepted help.
There is no magic wand, and its not that things never suck, and there is still recovery involved, but due to the kindness and generosity of others, there may just be a way that we may be able to make it/not lose our house/get out of this one.
TheSnackHound’s last blog post..Sitting on the Bubbler
August 28th, 2008 at 10:08 am
A lot of times a little act of kindness like a sincere smile can go a long way too. And the best thing is it doesn’t cost us anything to smile.
BK’s last blog post..Do You Remember How You Learned to Walk?
August 28th, 2008 at 10:21 am
@Kathy: non-tongue, no deal. Haha.
Richard Catto’s last blog post..[LOLCAT PIC] Seven weeks, bitch! Seven FUCKING weeks!
August 28th, 2008 at 10:26 am
Bob, a bachelor who works with my husband eats out for lunch every day and when he gets pizza, he’ll buy an extra slice or two for me! I think that’s so unnecessary but very nice of him. I LOVE pizza! Also, whenever there are special treats left that someone brought into my husband’s place of employment, my husband will bring me one of them. I think that’s nice too.
Karen, author of “My Funny Dad, Harry”’s last blog post..Organizing Tip for Week 11: Coupons
August 28th, 2008 at 11:53 am
I find people are very inconsiderate in general.. and it makes me very twitchy
fragileheart’s last blog post..A simple, customizable footrest
August 28th, 2008 at 12:13 pm
Wow!!! What a response!!
I went into work last week for a meeting. I was obviously looking pretty pitiful. A fellow coworker offered to work for me the next day without me even asking her!! It was so thoughtful!!!
KFJ’s last blog post..’80’s Fix Wednesday
August 28th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
I’m hard pressed to think of the last act of kindness someone did for me. This probably explains why I am so stressed lately…
kev’s last blog post..Single, Awesome Male Seeks Single, Awesome Female
August 28th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Henson Ray — The problem with common courtesy is it’s not as common anymore, I’m afraid. That’s why it feels so shocking. I’ll check out your poem!
TheSnackHound — Your story warmed my heart. I’m so sorry about your husband’s health issue and the fear of losing your home. But it’s wonderful to hear of all the people who jumped to help you both through a difficult time. I know people generally hate to accept help, but if we don’t let them, we all lose. Thanks for sharing your story. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
BK — And it can’t hurt the smiler either!
Richard Catto — You drive a hard bargain.
Karen — Why is Bob still a bachelor then? He sounds like a catch! A wonderful woman at work brought me a gift bag full of assorted potato chip bags. Just because she knows I love chips. And another brings me special cheese curls you can only get in western PA whenever she visits her dad out there. Those little surprises always make my day!
fragileheart — Have faith. You’ll run into a considerate one eventually and it’ll make you forget all the cranky ones. Guaranteed.
KFJ — That’s amazing and generous! I’m happy for you. Boy, I’ve been smiling the whole way through these comments. I’m truly uplifted!
kev — It’s probably because people think you don’t need anything. Try a KFJ and look pitiful next time (see above).
August 28th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Aww what a nice post
Nice use to make me vomit, but I have softened in my old age.
My most excellent friends from blogging have been super nice letting me stay with them, taking time off to meet up with me and been generally wonderful about my trip starting this coming Tuesday! woot.
I always try to do nice things for people, even though I pretend to be a bitch most of the time.
Claire’s last blog post..Doodle Fire
August 28th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
You did it, you let someone in line who had a few items. I would have hugged you too. I almost wrote a post on this subject last week. I had one can of cat food but I stood in line behind a woman for twenty minutes anyway. She looked at me and my one can of food too, but it didn’t seem to phase her. I wanted to push her down.
Anyway, you’re right, one simple act of kindness can make someone else’s day, in addition to preventing a possible act of violence. (I’m kidding)
In all seriousness, kindness is definitely the best virtue. Great post~
Cheers~
Annie
Annie’s last blog post..I Am An Awesome Blogger Friend …And ….
August 28th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Just a little smile when you least expect it…or looking into someone’s eyes and really, really, really engaging in conversation. That is a slice of real. Kindness.
Mimi Lenox’s last blog post..My Cell Phone Is Possessed By The Devil
August 29th, 2008 at 4:48 am
Just a simple smile matters to me. I really appreciate every little kindness, most especially when it comes from people whom you least expect it to come from.
Who needs a hug right now? I do.
Alex’s last blog post..It’s hard to breathe
August 29th, 2008 at 6:18 am
Claire — That’s OK, I won’t tell anyone you’re getting soft. Have a blast on your trip! And keep showing kindness, even when you feel bitchy. It’ll throw everyone off!
Annie — Bless you for not pushing her down! I do think half the crankiness in the world would evaporate if people would just give others a break now and then. I mean, didn’t we learn this in kindergarten?
Mimi Lenox — Yes! And not always searching for the next thing to say. I always have to work on that — just listening. I’m a lousy conversationalist anyway. Smiles!
Alex — Absolutely. Throws people off a little and the feeling can last the whole day. What a gift. {{hugs}}
August 29th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
Lets all do a act of kindness on tuesday.
August 29th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
How about a spontaneous funny moment? I take orders at the drive-thru where I work and this lady was in the process of ordering multiple items when her passenger pipes up with “…and a partridge in a pear tree”! It really made our day since a lot of people are so snippy first thing in the morning and only want their coffee!
Anna’s last blog post..5th Annual OROC 5K Walk/Run
August 29th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
@Anna: Oh, shoot we are fresh out of pear! But we got it in apple. Will apple work for you?
Richard Catto’s last blog post..[LOLCAT PIC] Seven weeks, bitch! Seven FUCKING weeks!
August 29th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
@Kathy: it’s hard alright. haha.
You keep feeding me these great straight lines.
Richard Catto’s last blog post..[LOLCAT PIC] Seven weeks, bitch! Seven FUCKING weeks!
August 29th, 2008 at 7:46 pm
OFF TOPIC (for now!): Kathy! You’ve been given an “I ‘Heart’ Your Blog” Award. Check out this post for details:
http://donva.blogspot.com/2008/08/im-bloggin-my-heart-out.html
(Don’t blow this off! It’s the first award I’ve been able to give!)
Don’s last blog post..I’m Bloggin’ My Heart Out
August 29th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
“It doesn’t take a huge donation to charity to change the world. All it takes are simple acts of kindness. It costs you nothing and pays big.”
How true!
Vera’s last blog post..Culinary dreams and Page Rank News!
August 30th, 2008 at 5:44 am
brooke — Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday and…
Richard Catto — Oh, geez. I’ll stop now.
Vera — Yesterday a colleague I hadn’t seen in a while asked me if I lost weight. (I hadn’t). I hugged her. And that set the tone for the rest of my day. I couldn’t have been happier that someone thought I looked thinner!
August 30th, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Don — It was perfectly ON topic! Thanks for the award love. You made my day!
August 30th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
It was kismet! I swear it! Once I posted the “hearty” award on my blog, I raced around to the blogs I threw my heart to and simply threw comments at them to let them know they were recipients. I hadn’t even read this post yet!
Anyway, you’re very welcome. Thank YOU for the laughs!
Don’s last blog post..I’m Bloggin’ My Heart Out
September 1st, 2008 at 6:44 am
Don — Oh, that’s funny. Your timing was perfect, though. You have a great sixth sense!
September 18th, 2008 at 8:40 pm
Gosh, I honestly don’t remember the last random act of (stranger) kindness I received. I do try to be courteous to others though. Silly things like letting people into traffic or my lane, or going above and beyond for people at work. I think when you make things just a little easier for other people- it makes your life less stressful too. Win-win.
Corrina’s last blog post..Why Recycling Is Bad
September 19th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Corrina — But it’s the little things like letting people ahead of you in traffic that changes their mood, even if only for a moment! I’m convinced it’s what keeps us all sane, these little acts of kindness. Win-win is right-right!