I’m an Ill-Prepared Total Slob (UPDATED)
Stupid things I do, Travel December 15th, 2010So you know those unlucky motorists stranded in snow on a Canadian highway for 24 hours?
Yeah.
Better them than me, because if that were me, I’d be the one pounding on other people’s car windows asking to be let inside because my car ran out of gas, I have no heat and no blanket or anything that qualifies as something smart people do to winterize their vehicles.
I put gas in mine. It makes it go. That’s helpful.
Here’s what I have in my car that’s not:
The front seat: Christmas wrapping paper, a shopping bag, ice scraper and a newspaper from last week that I picked up from my driveway.
The back seat: Jumpin’ Jesus. We have a Consumer Reports magazine, an alumni magazine, a shopping bag, a bag of plastic bags, notebooks, empty water bottle, ice scraper, a Congratulations on Your Graduation card I addressed and stamped a year ago but never mailed, a hoodie from a spring coat and a pair of bacon sneakers.
Nowhere in there is a blanket, first aid kit, water, flashlight, extra clothing and gloves or snacks.
Also nowhere for anyone to sit, actually.
So don’t ask me for a ride or anything. I clearly own and operate a junk yard on wheels. I’m an unprepared Pig Pen.
How ‘bout you?
UPDATE: OK, so y’all got me worried about being impaled by something in the back seat of my car in an accident.
So I got cleanin’.
Do I get a gold star?
Stumble it!
December 15th, 2010 at 6:46 pm
I actually have a safety kit…and 2 puppies that have bedding in their puppy crates … perhaps a wee big pukey on occassion but hey, in a pinch. And puppies are warm and cuddly. I will, I think, start carrying a bottle of water back there though.
I am only a few hours from that mess…further north – and we drive 2.5 hours 2x a week or more …after hearing about the Sarnia mess, I’m thinking maybe we could do a bit better packing the van… at LEAST some kibble for the babies! What WOULD I have fed them if I had been in that mess?
flit´s last blog post ..1 downfar too many to go
December 15th, 2010 at 6:49 pm
You could always eat the bacon sneakers so that you would not go hungry.
Down here in Texas, I should have water for the heat but I figure that there is a StarBucks on almost every corner, so I’m good.
btw my car looks like yours. You can go ahead and send that card. Just blame the delay on the naked mailman.
December 15th, 2010 at 6:52 pm
Awesome! Take that Bryan! I’m not the only slob!
Also, does Jesus Jump, ya’ think? Well…I suppose he must have at some point…hmmmm
Oh and the answer is no..totally unprepared. I’d be covering myself with an old shirt from the summer and my really dirty floor mats. I’d be digging for food in the trash pile behind the passenger seat and eventually we’d all eat the little dog (a little stringy I’m sure, but if you’re starving….)
lisa @boondock ramblings´s last blog post ..I want toys!!!
December 15th, 2010 at 6:55 pm
I confess I am anal about that stuff…I have candles ,snack bar,blanket ..all those other things…so it’s OK if your stuck in the snow and you see a vehicle with a Hooters bumper sticker..Dukes of Hazzard whip antenna… come on over and get warm…:)
robert bourne´s last blog post ..The Road the middle years part 12
December 15th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
A few months ago, my car looked just like yours. I have since cleaned it out and am very anal about keeping it clean. (My reasoning was two fold: 1 – My car is on its last leg. If it needs to go into the shop for anything more than basic maintenance, I’m selling it and I don’t want to worry about cleaning it out at that point. 2 – Anything in your car can and will become a projectile in an accident. I have become a super car seat nut and I don’t want me to the have perfectly placed my daughter in her seat only to have something in the car hit her in the head during a accident.)
However, with all that said, I really need to put an emergency kit in my trunk because I have absolutely nothing in terms of emergency equipment except jumper cables, a cell phone & a AAA membership card. 🙂
December 15th, 2010 at 7:11 pm
That looks just like the back seat of my car. Kudos to you though. At least you have an ice scraper. [Or two.] I should probably at least put one of those in my glove compartment.
And I still covet your Bacon Sneakers.
meleah rebeccah´s last blog post ..Channeling My Inner ‘Chris Turk’
December 15th, 2010 at 7:17 pm
I don’t have a car so I can get away with laughing out loud at the mess in yours. Mo keeps her car very clean and tidy but I don’t think she carries any of those ’emergency’ type things. Maybe a few band aids and a bandage but no blanket or flashlight to my knowledge. Of course she’ll probably tell me she has those things and that I don’t know what I’m talking about.
Babs – beetle´s last blog post ..“It brightens” – A story from Mo’s childhood
December 15th, 2010 at 7:41 pm
After living in Texas for a long time, we got used to never letting the cars be less than 1/2 full of gas, always having water and money and raingear on hand, for the hurricanes. Up here, due to the Great Thanksgiving Snowstorm of 2010, when I did have 1/2 tank of gas, but no blanket, food or MOST IMPORTANT tire chains…we now have a snow emergency kit in the back. It took me 3 hours to go 20 miles, and I did a 360 in the middle of the freeway, and this was in a front wheel drive car going about 10mph. I did grow up in the snow, though, so at least all those brodies I did in the Safeway parking lot came in handy during the 360!
December 15th, 2010 at 7:41 pm
I once spent the night trapped on a highway. I was returning to Silicon Valley from Lake Tahoe, CA., in the middle of a snow storm, and they simply closed the road with all the vehicles on it. There was no way to get off the highway unless you where at an off ramp. Fortunately, I was returning from a stay at a friends cabin and I had a down sleeping bag in my car or I would have frozen to death.
You’d be able to make a pretty good improvised shelter with all that stuff in your back seat. 🙂
HJ Smith´s last blog post ..Hoo’s that in the middle of the road
December 15th, 2010 at 7:48 pm
I beleive that McGyver would have a field day stranded in your car….you, however, not so much.
On another note, if I lived in the wintery north, I would fill my car chock full of gear to last for days in the snow. It would be like a Swedish holiday in a small hotel room, and an excellent way to skip out on a few days work, sort of like a paid vacation. My iPod, a few good books and an electric blanket that plugs into the cigarette lighter with a full tank of gas……HEAVEN!
Bruce´s last blog post ..Multi-Tasking
December 15th, 2010 at 8:00 pm
Well normally during winter on any given day I could have a heavy coat, sweatshirt and light jacket tossed in the back seat. I keep a sheet in the back to cover the back seat for the dogs when they ride with me, an umbrella, and a bottle of Febreeze. Oh and a box of tissues. Ya, I’d be a frozen popcicle in a heart beat after I ran out of gas before anyone else I’m sure. I don’t suppose the option of calling someone to come get me would have sufficed lol
blueyes´s last blog post ..Faster
December 15th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
First of all, I can’t believe that someone without kids has a car that cluttered. And secondly, I bet you could get anything you wanted or needed, no matter where you were by bartering your bacon shoes.
December 15th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
I live less than 5 miles from Laporte County Indiana that had a snow emergency declared for two days this week. I drove home from my job through the whiteout- a trip that normally takes 12-13 minutes. It took me nearly an hour. And I made it. My two co-workers were stranded. We had an idiot boss tell us that weather was not a reason to leave early. (he was in Chicago)
Yeah, stay off the roads- if you don’t have a freaking idiot boss!
BTW, our essential job? Giving free samples at the grocery store. I kid you not.
December 15th, 2010 at 8:55 pm
This isn’t really Shieldmaiden1196, but her husband, Unfinished Dude, but I know she would want me to respond in the following manner. This is from her, or I imagine her response: “As an EMT, I have to tell you that you are putting yourself in serious danger when you get into a crash. You see all that junk? Imagine it being propelled at 40 or 50 mph or more into the back of your head. Yep, you’re asking for it. Of course, I’ve told my dear sister-in-law this too, but she doesn’t listen either.” 🙂 or wait 🙁 <– and this is from me, Unfinished Dude, but only because I love you, babe.
Shieldmaiden1196´s last blog post ..The Inevitability of December
December 15th, 2010 at 9:35 pm
Hey, I did a post like this a few months ago when I was toting around my saddle, riding clothes, gym clothes, lia sophia jewelry for a show I was about to do and it occurred to me that maybe this was not normal!
sparkling74´s last blog post ..Sunchips Are So Not Degrading
December 15th, 2010 at 11:13 pm
I was smart a few years back. I saved the “foil” blanket and hat that they made me wear when I had hernia surgery and I stuck it in the car. It folds up really tiny, but it helps keep you warm. I thought it would be good in an emergency. Okay, I’ll look like a Jiffy Pop popcorn, but I’ll be warm, darn it!!
Oh, and I have some stale gum that I could eat. Hooray!
lin´s last blog post ..Im Never Wordless Wednesday
December 16th, 2010 at 3:00 am
No first aid kit, no blanket, no food, no GPS, no license or registration, no map, no cell phone, one packet of chewing gum, and if I keep going for another few years, I’ll arrive in the nineteenth century.
Murr Brewster´s last blog post ..Drugs
December 16th, 2010 at 4:48 am
I have nothing useful in my van. I have crayons and coloring books and some random toys from a few Happy Meals. I don’t think that’s enough, even for MacGyver, to work with.
cardiogirl´s last blog post ..Who Stumbled you If you follow the bread crumbs you can figure it out
December 16th, 2010 at 5:13 am
flit — But, but, what about you? Will you eat the kibble too?
Ratt’n Along — Don’t think I wouldn’t. My husband says I don’t need to worry because I don’t drive far, but you never know! I think I’m going to send the card. She’ll be happy and confused at the same time.
Lisa — I’d say show this post to your husband, but he’ll just say we’re both in big doo doo for being such slobs. And now I’m worried about all the projectiles people are saying we have in our cars. If I clean out mine, will you clean out yours?
robert bourne — It sounds like a party in your truck. I’m in! I’ll be the woman in bacon shoes crying and shivering, so be sure to let me in.
KK — OK, after reading your comment, it is my goal to clean out my car by this weekend. Although most of the things in there are soft, I still don’t want to be smacked in the face by my own shoes and have a window scraper impale me. Consider it done! Oh, and I don’t have AAA. Is that any surprise?
meleah rebeccah — Yes, yes you should! They cost a dollar! Get thee to a convenience store! I laughed about the glove compartment. I can’t fit a single thing in there anymore and I have no idea what’s inside that I need. I’m sure it’s packed with restaurant menus, which as we all know, are essential when you’re stuck in a snowdrift.
Babs Beetle — I swear I’m cleaning it out now. I’m scared about all the projectiles that KK says I’m driving around with. Mo strikes me as a prepared sort of person. Check the trunk. I bet you’re good.
Karen — Sorry to hear of your harrowing story! THAT’S exactly why I need to get my sh*t together. I have a million blankets and I’m sure I can gather up the rest of a road kit pretty easily. I’ve been scared straight!
HJ Smith — So what does one do when they’re stuck like that? I wonder if people get out of their cars and talk to each other. Do people share food? Cell phones? Do you let the car run only periodically? Do you have to clear away snow from the exhaust? What if you have to go to the bathroom? OMG. This can’t happen to me. I’d be doomed.
Bruce — Oh, ye have little faith. Surely I could fashion a coat out of the two magazines, the hoodie, the pads of paper and the shopping bags. And I would look way more stylish than MacGyver. Oh, and I wanna be stuck with you in the snow. That sounds like a hotel on wheels.
blueyes — Oh, so if you die in the snow, you’ll smell spring fresh? Awesome. Oh, wait. The dog sheets can’t smell that good. Nevermind.
sheila — It’s because I have no children that it looks like that. You get slobbish because you can. It’s also why I’ve been known to have ice cream and cake for breakfast. I shan’t give up my bacon shoes for anything. I’d die before I give them up!
newbuffalowmom — Sorry to hear that, on both counts. I’ll never understand why employers make you risk life and limb driving in treacherous conditions, especially when a lot of us can easily telecommute. When someone figures that out, let me know. Your boss is a tool.
Unfinished Dude — As God is my witness, I’m cleaning out all my projectiles by this weekend. You’ve scared me straight. Tell Shieldmaiden thanks for saving my life (and Lisa’s, if she’s accepts my challenge to clean out her car, too).
sparkling74 — Hey! Your stuff sounds more like projectiles than my stuff! So, tell me. Did you clean it all out? Was it just temporary, or does it still look like a yard sale in there?
lin — Jiffy Pop. Hilarious! Once I drove by where a 5K race just ended, and all the runners were wearing their Jiffy Pop outfits. It looked like some kind of strange Halloween party just let out.
Murr Brewster — I do believe you’re more screwed than I am. And I didn’t think that was possible. Oh, please do at least throw a blanket in there, will ya? I will.
cardiogirl — This surprises me. You’re a Girl Scout leader. Shouldn’t you at least have boxes of cookies laying around? They last for years, you know.
December 16th, 2010 at 6:26 am
I just stayed huddled in my car; I could only run the engine occasionally since I didn’t want to make matters worse by running out of gas. You had to stay in or near your car because no one knew when the highway would open and traffic would start moving again. No one came to my car asking for food or TP. Thankfully, I did not have to use any TP that night; being a guy comes in handy at times like that. A hike through the snow to a location where I could drop my drawers would not have been fun.
HJ Smith´s last blog post ..Hoo’s that in the middle of the road
December 16th, 2010 at 7:04 am
Well, if you got stranded in snow, maybe you could wrap yourself up in the gift wrap to stay warm. It seems like you might need to keep a P-Mate in there, too. Just in case.
Daisy the Curly Cat´s last blog post ..The Outside Room
December 16th, 2010 at 8:42 am
Considering that it snows about once every 3 years up here, I have the feeling by the time I need them my PopTarts will be stale, the blanket will have big moth holes in it, everything in the First Aid kit will be expired, and the flashlight batteries will be dead. Also, if I had needed to go to the bathroom out there on the freeway, I would’ve wet my pants before I got out of that car with all those ‘I’ve got a 4 wheel drive, I can go 60 mph along the side of the road if I want’ people zooming around. Better to pee in my seat than through a tube at the hospital!
Karen´s last blog post ..Facebook Family Pictures
December 16th, 2010 at 10:35 am
So, now I don’t feel so bad being called “the traveling saleswoman,” my back seat is even worse and the trunk has it’s random gloves, memo book, recycling, sandals someone gave me that don’t fit. I will clean it out over the holidays. What I started doing after the Feb 14 snow storm is make sure my cell is always charged enough and I throw in a carry-all bag filled with TP, two old jackets, and a few magazines. Careful about the water, if you leave it in the car forever it will get yucky–I did this and I wouldn’t even let the dog drink it.
Kathy if you need an old blanket-remember the inside lining of the car cam be used in an emergency. Personally, I’d leave the car immediately and find a nice home or business I would never last that long in a car, it’s just not worth it.
December 16th, 2010 at 10:51 am
I’m afraid I can no longer identify some of the items in my car… they’ve been there that long!
CatLadyLarew´s last blog post ..Tis the Season to be called Boom Boom
December 16th, 2010 at 12:36 pm
I suppose you could eat the bacon sneakers if you got desperate enough…
Pricilla´s last blog post ..Well- Its Not Rain
December 16th, 2010 at 12:43 pm
Go clean out that car! It would drive me crazy! I mean, I have two big dogs that travel in my car and it’s immaculate. I have water, blankets, and even energy bars in the car all neatly stowed away. All three of our cars get washed once a week. What is all that junk in your car? Kathy! Clean that out!
Linda Medrano´s last blog post ..Theres A First Time For Everything
December 16th, 2010 at 12:45 pm
my car is pretty clean in terms of projectiles (unless you count the cloth grocery bags!) and a small shoe box from Rubbermaid contains the emergency goods — flare, granola bars, space blanket (I love the Jiffy Pop look!), yadda yadda, yadda – have a friend who’s car looks like your photos — we call the car her ‘purse on wheels’, kleenex, nail file, spare shoes, etc. – all are found in her back seat!
December 16th, 2010 at 2:54 pm
Your car is such a mess! If we were stuck in Gerard’s car, the Kia, we would be in trouble except that it has a very good heater. He keeps it spotless and junk free. Now, in my van, I have to blankets (one covers the back seat to protect it from dog fur and the other is folded in the way back for emergencies.) I think I have a first aid kit in the van too!
Karen and Gerard´s last blog post ..The Holiday Tag
December 16th, 2010 at 3:22 pm
Boy can I feel righteous now! In the van we have a queen-size quilt, just in case. There’s always bottles of water too, a lighter, anti-bacterial wipes, insect repellant wipes, probably other stuff I no longer remember. In the car, which never goes very far anymore, not so prepared.
Carol´s last blog post ..A Touch of White
December 16th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
It’s such a relief to know that I’m not the only one whose car is a mess. We do have a bag of sand to use for traction in case we get stuck, but no blankets or snacks or flares or snow boots. I found something in the back seat floorboard a while back that looked like an unshelled walnut. I can’t recall ever having eaten a walnut in the car.
absepa´s last blog post ..There are no magic numbers here
December 16th, 2010 at 4:32 pm
I may not have all that stuff in my back seat but I don’t have anything in my car that would be useful in an emergency either. Although I do have a car charger for my cell phone should I need to make a call and cry to someone and my phone is dead
Ann´s last blog post ..Duke vs the snowman
December 16th, 2010 at 5:50 pm
I too have an old Consumer Reports magazine sitting in my back seat with countless boxes from Amazon filled with packing peanuts that never made it to the recycle bin. I went all out this year and bought studded winter tires. I sound like a tank rolling through the streets, but the car never slip.
December 16th, 2010 at 6:36 pm
Well, I checked with Mo and she has: One reflector jacket (this is good), a tiny shovel (?) and a brush (??). Doesn’t seem very organized to me!
Babs – beetle´s last blog post ..“It brightens” – A story from Mo’s childhood
December 16th, 2010 at 7:34 pm
“We have a Consumer Reports magazine, an alumni magazine, a shopping bag, a bag of plastic bags, notebooks, empty water bottle, ice scraper, a Congratulations on Your Graduation card I addressed and stamped a year ago but never mailed, a hoodie from a spring coat and a pair of bacon sneakers.”
You would survive just fine. Wrap the alumni magazine and the Consumer Reports around your lower legs, tying them in place with strips from the plastic bags. You can slice them up handily with the business end of your scraper. Get that hood on your head, it’s not a fashion show, we’re surviving here. Using the scraper, fill one of the plastic bags with clean snow. Bring it in the car, nibble a small hole in one corner, and drip water into your empty water bottle, by using your insulated legs to warm the bag. Bacon sneakers will do for mittens, if you’re sans gloves. Better than nothing, I guess. Oh, and the notebook? Use your cigarette lighter to ignite some paper and back seat cushion outside the car to alert your rescuers. Or, you can write tragic farewell letters to your loved ones. But that’s just what I would do….
When ya got lemons, make lemonade. Shame you don’t have any lemons in your glovebox, cuz you’d be SET!
.endtransmission.´s last blog post ..Chipotle Diaper
December 16th, 2010 at 8:38 pm
Maybe, you can use some of those to keep you warm. Just be creative Kathy. Cheers. =)
RonLeyba´s last blog post ..After Christmas Sales 2010
December 17th, 2010 at 5:06 am
HJ SMith — Yes, being a guy would come in handy. Especially because in the Canadian road shutdown video, it didn’t look like there was any coverage for woman to “go” privately. I’m never taking a road trip in the winter. Ever.
Daisy the Curly Cat — And I would look so pretty, right? Ugh. The P-Mate. I’ve heard of those. I never want to be in a position to need one, but yeah, if you gotta go, that would make it easier than the alternative. You’re always thinkin’, Daisy!
Karen — You have good points there, but as for the Pop Tarts, I’d totally eat them, even if they disintegrated in my hands. Food is food. My worst nightmare would be having to pee on the side of the road. Daisy has a good idea though.
just mary — Mary! Let’s both clean! I started last night and took about maybe a third of my junk. It can be done! I love that you have shoes, too, especially ones that don’t fit. Totally useless. I have about ten extra blankets in my house. One of them is going to become a permanent car blanket, lemme tell you. Now go clean your car!
CatLadyLarew — It’s like taking a trip down memory lane, isn’t it? I figure if I have to think more than five seconds about why I was saving something, it goes in the trash.
Pricilla — If I’m desperate, I would eat a shoe. Like these guys stranded on an island. Remember them?
Linda Medrano — I started last night! Got about a third of it removed, some stuff thrown out. I’m on a roll! I might even follow up with a picture this weekend, so you can see what a good job I’m doing.
CC — And none of your friend’s things would help her either in an emergency, right? Tell her if I can clean mine out, she can too! I’ve already started. People who commented her about my stuff being projectiles in an accident got me worried.
Karen and Gerard — Good for you both! I’m getting there. I’m beginning the process of junk removal and it feels great!
Carol — I would feel safe and secure driving with you anywhere. My goal is to do the same for my car. I’m getting there! Started cleaning it out last night.
absepa — LMAO about the walnut. I’m afraid to look under my seats. I might find something that was once food and is so old I can’t even identify it. Pray for me.
Ann — I’m worse off in the phone department. It charges fine, but half the time it doesn’t even turn on. I have to reboot it constantly. But that’s what you get when you buy a Playskool phone for less than $20. I figure if I’m stuck near other people, they’ll let me use their phone. If I let them wear my fabulous bacon shoes.
Medical Assistant — I’m glad you have such awesome wheels to cart around your packing peanuts. They’re riding in style. No go recycle them! Do it! Do it now!
Babs Beetle — See? She did have some good stuff in there. The shovel is important, and so is kitty litter or sand. I’m on a mission to outfit my car with everything I need for a road emergency. I can’t change a tire to save my life, but at least I won’t go hungry or freeze to death. Weeeee!
endtransmission — OMG. Are you MacGyver? You’re MacGyver, aren’t you? I won’t have to write tragic goodbye letters because clearly I can get myself out of a jam with your awesome instructions. Also, are you available for when I take a long road trip? I could totally use your creative thinking and mad survival skillz.
RonLeyba — All the paper and bags are going. I’m putting a giant blankie in my car. No worries now. I’m doing this!
December 17th, 2010 at 2:50 pm
I have not been very thoughtful in posting comments on your blog. I want to tell you how much I appreciate you being my blog friend and I want to wish you a
very MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR.
grannyann´s last blog post ..Sears Catalog- Bubble Lights and Roller Skates
December 17th, 2010 at 4:01 pm
Oh my gosh, Kathy, your back seat looks like MY back seat. Just add more CDs to that and you’ve got it.
Anyway, you can build yourself a blanket from all the papers. It retains heat perfectly. Really.
No, really.
Jenn of Many Cabbages´s last blog post ..Facebook Like Function Spoils Dexter Netflix Savorability Factor
December 17th, 2010 at 7:58 pm
I have an umbrella, combination ice scraper and brush, in addition to several garbage bags covering the back seat floor in case my dog that gets car sick gets car sick. His limit is a seven minute car ride. I’ve timed it. I’m sure if stranded on a highway, he’d be puking for hours, though maybe I could harness the energy somehow.
Lauren´s last blog post ..1960 Plane Crash Victims Families Exploited by Local Media
December 18th, 2010 at 12:03 pm
Still waiting for that photo to prove you did clean it out and don’t have any dangerous projectiles in it. It’s noon. Where’s your phot?
Unfinished Rambler´s last blog post ..Patron of the Week- Mr-Mrs-Ooh-Ooh-That-Smell
December 18th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
Oops and photo too. 😉
December 18th, 2010 at 2:41 pm
OOOOOOOOOOOO…pretty!
Karen´s last blog post ..My MotherComplicated Relationships
December 18th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
If I knew how to put a gold star here, I would. Yes, you definitely get a gold star.
December 21st, 2010 at 9:10 pm
Hey Kathy,
My front seat looked like your backseat for a long time, until my wife refused to drive my car unless I cleaned it first.
The funny thing is, going through everything I was amazed at how prepared I actually was. I had a blanket, 3 sweaters, a roadside emergency kit, and a box of granola bars…that expired 6 months ago. (do you know how long it takes for those things to go bad…?)
Anyway even though the car was cleaned it only lasted for about a week. I hope you can keep yours cleaner for longer than I did 🙂
Steve
Steve Markham´s last blog post ..Nicoderm Cq Coupons