How an Angry Cat Makes Demands
cats April 29th, 2012
Dear Homeowner and Servant,
I wish to inform you that the new food you’ve been serving me is not at all to my liking.
Yes, I know the [claw air quote] vet [claw air quote] said you should feed me that nasty wet venison and dry food so I have better poops.
But you see, I’m not really fond of either selection.
Therefore, this is what you can expect to find in the morning, afternoon and evening. The ones you found on Monday and Wednesday were just the beginning.
Nice trick bringing one downstairs for you to find, eh?
Whatever roll you leave out gets the treatment. I have all day to work on it. And my claws and teeth go deep. Just sayin’.
Please refrain from all attempts to encourage me to eat this new food. I know what it is. You know what it is.
I miss my old stuff.
Yes, I understand you are very happy with the state of my poop situation with this new diet, but you would be wise to give into my demands, lest you find more than toilet paper destroyed.
You have a whole walk-in closet full of clothing I haven’t even touched yet.
Regards,
Stumble it!
April 29th, 2012 at 9:12 pm
MOL …
Grace´s last blog post ..Did you ever notice that
April 30th, 2012 at 5:13 am
You know the cat always wins so you might as well give in and find some food it likes RIGHT NOW!
Karen and Gerard´s last blog post .."The Dog Who Danced" by Susan Wilson
April 30th, 2012 at 5:19 am
I think you should try to enjoy your new food. After all, good poopering is important!
Daisy the Curly Cat´s last blog post ..Monday Funnies!
April 30th, 2012 at 8:37 am
I am a pet lover but I feel crazy when my cats get mad with something, they are very annoying and their noise interrupt my day…
Naigel´s last blog post ..WSO Reviews
April 30th, 2012 at 9:05 am
I’d suggest another conversation with the “vet”. Cats being what they are, you are not likely to win this war and you are likely to find many shredded bit about the house.
Carol´s last blog post ..Sharing my World – Week 21
April 30th, 2012 at 9:18 am
That made me chuckle. Strange as it may seem, our cats never venture into the bathroom, aside from Sukie who, no matter what she’s doing, rushes to go in there WITH me. Every time.
By the way. Cats ALWAYS get their way!
Babs´s last blog post ..Train ride to danger
April 30th, 2012 at 11:39 am
Our cat Smokey does a real number on us with his food. He’ll try one and say “Why have you been feeding me those other horrible foods? Why didn’t you give me this wonderful chicken before? Why???” Then like fools we buy some more of the chicken he loves and he goes all “This shit is poison! What are you doing? I cannot eat this!” on us. Fine, change to tuna. Same drill. They are monsters!
Linda Medrano´s last blog post ..Birdsongs
April 30th, 2012 at 1:43 pm
Ut-oh! Your cat means BUSINESS, Kathy. I think you better listen!
meleah rebeccah´s last blog post ..Day 30: The Devil
April 30th, 2012 at 5:34 pm
Grace — I have to admit, I lol’d too!
Karen — I don’t think Shadow has that many choices. I did call the vet to report that she wasn’t eating. She insisted we try longer. A cat will not allow itself to starve, so yeah. She’s eating it. Reluctantly. Very reluctantly.
Daisy the Curly Cat — Yes, I agree. Her poopering is getting much better, so we know this new food is good for her. Except we might waste a 12-pack of toilet paper in the process. Still totally worth it.
Carol — Oh, we’re going to win. I just think I have to keep all TP locked up and close my closet doors. I’m afraid what she’ll shred next!
Babs — Every morning, without fail, both Lucky and Shadow come to supervise my bathroom activities. It’s as though they’re not sure I’ll remember to go downstairs next and feed them. Even though I’ve done so every day for 7 years. Ugh. Privacy, please!
Linda Medrano — Oh, that’s too funny. We like to think we’re in control here, but who are we kidding really? Nobody!
meleah rebeccah — Plus I’m afraid what she might do to me in my sleep!
April 30th, 2012 at 7:41 pm
Being a lifelong cat owner, I’ve noticed that while the cats may change, the attitudes are always the same. Maybe you could try mixing a little of the old stuff that he likes in with the new stuff that he hates.
What we won’t do for good poops. 😉
April 30th, 2012 at 8:23 pm
That cat is serious — I would meet his demands quickly!
🙂
Traci
May 1st, 2012 at 8:01 pm
Coming from a gal with digestive “issues”, I can certainly attest to the benefits of a good poop and I can tell you, it is totally underrated. I think that you, dear kitty, should be doing more thankful sorts of things, like killing spiders and licking up crumbs off the dinner table to show your appreciation to your family.
It can be worse, cat friend–just ask my Grace. She is forced to eat that non-flavored kidney-saving expensive crap the doctor guilts me into buying every month. It is awful crap that tastes like cardboard (that’s what Grace says anyway) and I end up mixing it with regular canned food to get it down, so it costs me like triple to feed the darn cat that looks like she never eats. Sigh.
The irony to all of this is that I bring table scraps (pork tenderloin, chicken breast, salmon, etc) to the stray kitties at work while my poor cat suffers eating expensive non-flavored food at home.
You can’t win, Kathy’s Cat. We just love you all so darn much!
lin´s last blog post ..Random Weird Stuff
May 2nd, 2012 at 5:04 am
injaynesworld — I actually asked the vet if I could do that, and she said “No!” Rats. We’ve gotten Shadow to eat more of her yucky dry food now, and even the second cat Lucky is trying it on for size. And Shadow’s poops are awesome. I’ll spare you the descriptive details.
Star Traci — She hasn’t destroyed anything since I wrote this, but that’s probably because she doesn’t have opposable thumbs and can’t get a roll out of the 12-pack.
Lin — I agree Shadow should be more thankful for good, solid poops. I mean, really. But instead, she wakes me too early, still insists on drinking directly from the kitchen sink faucet and blocks me from my laptop at every opportunity. Poor Grace! (Still laughing about the whisker post you wrote the other day). Don’t let Grace know you’re seeing other cats on the side and feeding them well. You just might find something unexpected in your shoe.
May 3rd, 2012 at 6:53 am
Hey Kathy,
The best way to introduce any new food to your cat is to do this over several days, mixing it with smaller and smaller amounts of new food, until you are sure that the cat has actually moved to eating the new food. Starting with a new food abruptly will only annoy the cat.
Samaira Jonathon´s last blog post ..iPage Coupon
May 10th, 2012 at 8:05 pm
Oh Lord. I give my cat what he wants to eat and a couple syringes of stool softener a day. A compromise of sorts. When he’s unhappy? Leaves a nice steaming pile right in the doorway to my bedroom. Not fun.