My Weight Loss Support System

Posted by Kathy on December 30th, 2013

chocolate santaMany of you know I’m on a weight loss journey and anyone else who’s been there knows that it helps to have a good support system.

My husband Dave sees how hard I’ve been working, watching calories and doing cardio every single day at 5AM.

Once in a while I have a craving for something sweet, sickening sweet.

But my support system of a husband was having none of it.

Tonight when he went to the store, I asked for “a Santa, a solid chocolate Santa, just one. They probably have leftover discounted stuff.”

He came home Santa-less.

He said “They didn’t have any Santas. Just Valentine candy and you didn’t say Valentine candy.”

I wanted to both hug him and punch him in the face.

It’s Like Winning a Nobel Prize, an Academy Award and the Lottery

Posted by Kathy on December 7th, 2013

sexy jeansThat first ten pounds.

I recently began a mission, a serious one this time, to lose 25% of my current weight and I’m on track to do it by spring.

How am I doing it? Simple. Somewhere between 1,200-1,400 calories of “clean” food a day, cardio 30 minutes daily and walking 10 miles a week.

I’ve lost 10 lbs so far in five weeks. Slow and steady, good momentum, highly motivated, feeling happy. I’ll get there.

Today was a very good day, since I was able to drop one size in my jeans. Any woman will tell you this is an exciting milestone moment. Like finding a bathing suit that doesn’t make you look like a sausage squeezed into its casing.

I jumped for joy, showered and headed out to do a bit of Christmas shopping.

At my first stop in my “new” jeans, everyone at the store held doors for me, offered me hugs and told me to have a good day.

Boy, this feels really wonderful!

At the next store, strangers stopped to tell me how fierce I looked in my jeans and asked how they too could look this fabulous.

I didn’t have time to explain, but thanked them anyway and darted to the checkout counter.

The cashier brushed aside customers that were ahead of me in line and said “I’m sorry, but you’ll have to let this lady with the smaller jeans ahead of you because she’s really feeling it today and it would just be better if you let Her Specialness through.”

And so they all stepped out of line and motioned me forward. They applauded and smiled and a couple people high fived me.

Then the cashier told me to just skip paying for my items – You should have all this for free, because you really look good in those jeans. I wish I could look so good in mine.

I thanked her and left to go to the last store, strutting down the sidewalk to the cheers of onlookers.

Great jeans, lady!

Way to rock the look, woman!

I didn’t know they made jeans that small!

When I got to the store, a band was waiting for me and they played a fine rendition of I’m Too Sexy and then they presented me with a congratulatory cake with candles on it that spelled out YOU ROCK! But I declined because cake is not how you get into these jeans, just sayin’.

I bought my last gifts and skipped out of the store to find a limousine waiting for me to take me home because people who can fit into smaller sized jeans shouldn’t have to be bothered with driving.

So you see, fitting into smaller jeans has its benefits. I’m just not telling you which of these benefits, if any, is true.

Well, the ten pounds is true.

And God Saw Everything He Made, and Behold, It Was Very Good. And Then He Added Bacon and Made It Better.

Posted by Kathy on November 9th, 2013

Fest signMy husband Dave and I made our pilgrimage to BaconFest in Easton, PA today and it did not disappoint!

We went just as it opened and ate breakfast, lunch and dinner in the span of two hours.

Come with me on a tour, won’t you?

Before I got all filled up and bloated, I thought I should have the obligatory pose with the fest’s maple syrup-toting mascot. Oink!

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Everywhere you turned – piglets and bacon!

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The fest wasn’t all about the food, but yeah, mostly about the food. There were a few oddball gifts you could buy for the bacon lover in your life.

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And there were silly little things like vegetables and non-artery-clogging items. Who let them in here?

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I’ve got to say these mushrooms looked amazing, though.

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Today I learned that bacon knows how to move. These were just some of the many food trucks dotting center square.

Bacon on wheels

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For breakfast we headed over to the waffle truck.

waffles

We picked Door #1, a waffle topped with caramelized onions, Belgium sugar crystals, maple syrup and BACON. Lots and lots of delicious bacon.

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For a snack, we shared large and toasty garlic knots topped with bacon.

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For lunch, we split a mind-blowing Nutella, strawberries and bacon crepe, so good I went back for another to take home. A sweet and savory delight!

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This thing. My God. This thing. Dave knew right away he had to have the Smoked Pork Parfait: Smoked pork layered between cheesy mashed potatoes and collard greens, then drizzled with BBQ sauce, cheese and bacon!

It put him over the top. He called it dinner and a day. He won’t be eating again until tomorrow. *Meal was larger than it appears.

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To satisfy your sweet tooth, there were maple bacon cupcakes, baklava, chocolate-covered bacon strips and jams and jellies of all kinds. I also found bacon biscuits and bacon mini-quiche that I brought home for later.

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cupcakes

baklava and bacon strip

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Before we left for the long, unbuttoned-pants ride home, we stopped and had our glucose and cholesterol checked. Actually, we didn’t. Rather, we laughed like hyenas, took a picture and kept walking. Limping, really.

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Incidentally, only the coolest dogs attend BaconFest.

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I’ll end our tour with video of one of the many piglet races scheduled throughout the day. Those poor little piggies, running around sweatin’ like, well, you know. (Sorry, couldn’t get this to embed.)

And they went wee, wee, wee, all the way home!

Hope you enjoyed my bacony tour. If you can get to the fest next year or any year, you must.

Long live bacon!

MOL. It’s Like LOL, Only Felinier

Posted by Kathy on October 17th, 2013

laughing catSo today I was remotely troubleshooting a client’s software problem when I happened to realize why her User ID reminds me of something.

A key part of her ID is “MOL” and I blurted out “OMG! You have MOL in your User Name!”

She’s like “What’s that?”

I’m all “It’s what Internet cats say in response to funny comments. You know, “Meow Out Loud.”

Silence.

I explained further “All Internet cats use that. It’s hilarious because they’re not LOL-ing, they’re MOL-ing. Get it? So cute!”

Silence.

I started to list all the famous Internet cats that I know who MOL to see if she recognized any.

She didn’t.

I immediately shut up about meowing out loud Internet cats and resumed working on her computer problem like a normal person.

But now I’m permanently that weirdo she has for tech support.

Awesome.

Identity Theft Made Easy

Posted by Kathy on October 11th, 2013

Identity theftThis afternoon I went down to the computer labs in my building at work to hang up signs about National Cyber Security Awareness Month. (Huh. How ‘bout that. A government site that’s still running….)

While I stood arranging things, I noticed a student sitting at a computer, talking on her cell phone. She was obviously giving information about some kind of account she needed to verify.

I know this because she blurted out all kinds of personal information, including her social security number, within earshot of me and all the other people present in the lab.

This, while I was putting up signs about safeguarding your data and protecting your identity online.

I laughed to myself when she spelled her name and for each letter, gave a word that started with each letter. “A as in apple. R as in rover. K as in…. K as in…. K as in….”

I wanted to scream out “kangaroo!!!!!!” to help her along, but she eventually thought of a word that started with K, the poor thing.

Then I wanted to tell her “You should probably take your conversation somewhere private because we can all steal your identity based on the information you gave out so far.”

But then she gave the person on the phone her birthdate.

Something something 1994.

I have underwear older than her.

This disturbed me, so I mentally punched her in the face and left her to give out all the rest of her personal information for those still in the lab.

I just don’t understand how a student smart enough to get into the university where I work can be so utterly careless when it comes to keeping her privacy.

Although….. if I stayed long enough, I might have gotten a credit card number. I did have some shopping to do.