Last month I wrote about 10 Things That Annoy Me. If you follow my blog, you know there can’t be only ten things. There can’t be only a hundred, really. So keep checking back for more lists.

Let’s get on with the show!

10 More Things That Annoy Me:

1. People who get on their cell phones as soon as they put their cars into gear. What? You couldn’t have had that conversation before you pulled out onto the open road where you will pay zero attention to other drivers while you order take-out?

2. My nose runs when I eat. Doesn’t matter whether I’m eating hot or cold food. I just finished a snack bag of Doritos and had to blow my nose. A co-worker saw me do it and asked if I had a cold. I lied and said "Yes, but I’m fine." That’s better than explaining the issue with my nose. No one understands. It doesn’t have a cool medical name. It garners no sympathy. It just runs.

3. Giada De Laurentis, host of Everyday Italian on the Food Network. She speaks perfect English without the slightest trace of an Italian accent. But when she says any word of Italian origin, suddenly she’s Sophia Loren. "Now we’ll add our ree-GAUGH-ta cheese and Rrrr-egiano parmi-GEE-ano…." Oh my God. I just want to punch her.

4. Two of my cats do not understand how to use their water dish. One won’t drink water unless it’s coming right out of the faucet. And the other picks up his food with his claws, while hovering over the bowl. He lets the morsels drop into the water and then promptly gets P.O.’d that there are chunks of food floating around in it. So he tips the bowl over and drinks off the floor. Guess which cat.

5. I’m physically unable to burp. The closest I get is a gurgle, which sounds like a sink backing up. It’s not only annoying, it’s painful. Please do NOT suggest I guzzle a carbonated beverage. No burp will come of that. It only backs up the pipes more.

6. Kazoos, bugles and bagpipes. They’re not instruments. They’re noise-makers. I used to work in the same office with someone who played a CD of nothing but bagpipe "tunes," if you can believe someone made a CD of only bagpipe music. I was tortured slowly for a few months, for no good reason.

7. My answering machine. It takes the stupid lady forever to GET TO THE FREAKING MESSAGE ALREADY! Have a listen.

8. Toyota, for not understanding that a sun visor has to be big enough to, you know, BLOCK THE SUN. Both Toyatas Dave’s owned never had long enough visors, so when I’m riding in the car, I have try to keep really straight and tall, squint, and wear sunglasses.

9. Starbucks, for making it impossible to order a cup of coffee without a PhD. Coffee used to be so simple. A friend of mine who has a PhD helped me out by writing this on a store business card. The front reads: "Please help this woman." On the back: "Mocha. Extra shot. Dark choc. Whip." Works for me.

10. Saran wrap. Tear off a sheet of cling wrap, and it does exactly that. It clings to itself and then you have to ball it up, throw it out and try again. I would never use this stuff if not for the need to see which of my leftovers is turning into penicillin in the refrigerator. What someone needs to invent is clear tin foil! Anyone? Anyone?

I’m throwing in a bonus 11th annoyance — this one from my husband, who wants to get in on The Annoying List action. He’s not a very annoyed person by nature, which is why we’re a perfect match. If we were both as annoyed as I am, we couldn’t live in the same house. But apparently some things do bother the man.

Here’s what annoys Dave: People who put slashes through 7’s and 0’s. His rant goes thusly: "And it’s always the ones who have perfect penmanship!!! It’s the slobs who need it, but they never do it, and the ones who do are probably the same people who write xx’s in place of zeros on their checks. You’re supposed to write 00/100!!!! Numbers go on checks! An ‘x’ is not a zero you half-wit!

Oh-kaaaaay.

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